Change of Darkness Read online

  Baindan.

  She wanted to scream at him to knock the training master to the ground, to beat Herrin bloody until he gasped his last breath, but she couldn’t get enough air into her lungs to do so. In fact, her vision had become blurry in places.

  Baindan was glaring at Herrin, and Siray knew that her friend’s warrior side was considering the vulnerable position that the master was in, with his weapon occupied in choking her.

  She hoped Baindan would take the risk—the other captives possibly getting free of this place, with or without her, was worth the cost—but when his gaze flicked to hers, she saw his warrior mentality step aside. To be replaced by the face of someone who had something greater to lose.

  And she finally grasped the truth that had been in front of her the entire time. Saw that it wasn’t a coincidence that he was the one who had rescued her so long ago from the underground prison. Saw that there was some reason why they kept finding each other. Knew from that one glance that his words the other night had only stated a fraction of the true depth of his feelings for her.

  And she understood why he had to do what he was about to do next.

  Have no doubts, he had said, as to my affection, my loyalty, and what I will do to protect you …

  The edges of Siray’s vision were dimming and swirling when Baindan’s blurry, dark shape raised his arms and let the wooden staff fall from his hands.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  SIRAY’S FIRST THOUGHT was that she felt numb, to the point where she couldn’t distinguish her toes from her feet. Thinking she was cold, she automatically reached for the blanket that she must have somehow tossed to the side, her hands groping around blindly. Then someone grabbed one of her searching hands.

  ‘Thank the Mother,’ they murmured in a low voice. ‘Siray? Can you hear me?’

  Forcing her way past the drowsiness that filled her mind, Siray blinked her eyes open, squinting a little as her eyes adapted to the glaring sunlight streaming down upon them. When she was able to focus on who it was peering down at her, she lifted her head and rose up onto her elbows, her body protesting stiffly against the slight movement.

  ‘Baindan?’ she croaked out, screwing up her eyes at the bright light that cascaded shadows over the male’s face.

  She felt his sigh of breath against her face as he briefly closed his eyes, then opened them again to give her a small smile. ‘Yeah. How do you feel?’ His shrouded eyes scrutinised her face.

  The moment she thought about it, Siray’s body seemed to regain its awareness, and the tingling numbness that had been there just a moment ago evaporated as the feeling in her head, legs, and arms returned with a vengeance. She swallowed painfully. ‘I feel as if I ran into a tree. And my throat …’ She trailed off, reaching up with her free hand to brush the tips of her fingers gingerly against the swollen skin there.

  Baindan nodded, shifting slightly as he eyed her. ‘It’s bruised. Not surprising, since Herrin made you pass out.’ His voice darkened noticeably.

  The mention of the training master brought everything rushing back to Siray, and in a state of anxiousness, she tried to lurch to her feet but only managed to sit up before she became dizzy and fell back against a soft but cold wall, soil crumbling down around her shoulders.

  Baindan steadied her with a firm hand on her shoulder. ‘Slowly,’ he cautioned softly. ‘You’ve been out for a bit.’

  Siray blinked and, obligingly, rose carefully to her knees. Upon waking, she had momentarily thought she was in her bed in the Resistance training camp, sleeping in the cabin with her unit. She pressed her lips firmly together. That place was gone, destroyed by the Faction.

  Now, she really looked about her, and breathed in the scent of the sea, so much stronger now than it had been earlier in the dome. She stared at the four dirt walls, two of them slightly longer than the others, all of them high and smooth.

  The pit.

  The realisation of where they were made Siray look around wildly, her furious scan halting when she identified someone half sitting, half slumped against the dirt wall at the other end. She tensed, her breathing becoming more rapid.

  ‘It’s okay, he’s unconscious,’ Baindan assured her quickly, tracking her gaze.

  Siray forced herself to take a deep breath in, then released it in a shaky whoosh. ‘You?’ she rasped.

  He nodded. ‘They rolled you in and threw me in after you. He,’—and here Baindan jerked his chin towards their unconscious companion—‘launched himself at us straightaway.’ Baindan shrugged. ‘He shouldn’t bother us for a span or two.’

  Siray nodded, relaxing a little, but she grew alarmed again as her mind pulled up another image. She turned her head away from Baindan, pretending to look at her sleeve as she tugged it down. ‘Loce. Did … did he …?’ She couldn’t bring herself to ask the question.

  ‘Yes.’ Baindan’s voice was subdued, and Siray closed her eyes against the grief and despair rising within her. ‘I saw a pair of guards checking him over as they dragged us away,’ Baindan continued, his voice an echo of her own feelings. ‘They were laughing over his corpse before Herrin made them haul him away.’

  Deep hatred filled Siray. Rowp, Deson, Jorgi, Loce. One by one, the Faction was taking her friends. Something in her gut twisted, and she turned back to Baindan, shifting position as she forced herself to her feet. She needed to see his face clearly. Look upon an ally and know she wasn’t alone. Know that there might be a shred of hope left.

  With the sun now at her back, she raised her eyes to Baindan’s … and flinched. She could now see that one of his eyes was swollen, a dark bruise welling beneath, and also spied a bloody tear in his bottom lip, a track of dried blood leading from it down over his chin. Another bruise was still in the process of blossoming across his left cheek.

  Horrified, she reached out a trembling hand, wanting to touch him, see if he was okay. ‘What did they do to you?’ she asked hoarsely.

  Baindan shrugged. ‘They gave me a bit of a beating. Worth it, to land one on Herrin, though. Besides, it’s not that bad—I’ll take care of it later.’

  Siray knew that meant he intended to Change into another form at some point, to speed up the healing process. But he never would have had to do so if she hadn’t been foolish enough to confront Herrin. She glanced down, ashamed and angry at herself over her lack of control.

  But Baindan’s gentle hand on her chin guided her face back up to gaze at his face. His deep-grey eyes looked intently into hers, and she read the profession of his feelings for her. His desire, compassion, admiration, loyalty, friendship … and love. For there was no other word to describe the warmth, tenderness, and complete understanding written there. This male knew her—recognised and accepted both her strengths and weaknesses—and still worshipped her.

  Siray’s heart seemed to leap in her chest as she stood there, unable to move, barely able to breathe. What was she waiting for? There might never be another chance like this to speak with him alone.

  After closing her eyes for an instant as she gathered up her courage, Siray peered back steadily at Baindan as she felt his hands clasp hers. It took her a moment to be able to drop the guard she had kept in place over the last few days to mask her feelings, but she wanted him to see that she returned his affection. Wanted him to know that she had made her choice. And that she was ready to declare it.

  She took a deep breath. ‘Baindan,’ she said throatily, ‘I need to tell you something.’ She paused, felt Baindan tense. Come on, you can do this, Siray urged herself. It’s not the same with Zale. Baindan is the one. She lifted her chin higher. ‘I’ve made my decision.’

  Baindan’s face went still, yet a glimmer of hope began to shine through. He interlocked his fingers with hers.

  That gesture gave Siray the final strength she needed. She exhaled swiftly and, determined to say the words before her wheezing voice gave out completely, said, ‘I want to be with—’

  And just like that, her voice died away, as another th
ought entered her mind, triggered by the very sentence she had been about to speak. It was like a chain reaction of thoughts, like a wave set loose that gathered speed and strength, sweeping her mind along with it to the conclusion.

  Baindan was here. With her. In the pit. Where only the strongest emerged.

  The strongest … The image of the bloodied female climbing out of the pit the previous day hit Siray almost like a physical blow.

  She felt her face pale. ‘No. Oh, no …’ She untangled her hands from Baindan’s, raising them to cover her face as if she could block out the horror of what she had just realised, almost staggering away from him as she tried to escape her own thoughts.

  There was three of them in the pit. And only one could emerge.

  Baindan’s voice was tight. ‘It’s okay, Siray. We’ll be okay.’

  He already knew what it was she had only just realised. But had been ready to declare himself despite it.

  She shook her head, still backing away from him. Not because she had any concerns about what he might do, but because the thought that they might be torn apart now, just when she had finally dared to envision the future they might have together, threatened to break her.

  She could not bring herself to speak of it now.

  Baindan quickly covered the small amount of ground between them, catching up Siray’s hands in his larger ones. ‘We’ll be okay,’ he repeated, his thumbs stroking over the back of her hands. ‘We’ll figure it out.’

  Siray found herself breathing rapidly. The guards would never let them out of here. Not unless one of them killed the other. She squeezed her eyes shut, the image, the very thought, making her ill. ‘I’m so sorry,’ she whispered to him. ‘I did this.’ She felt her fingers go numb in his. ‘I did this to us. I put us here.’

  Baindan slowly backed her up to the wall behind her, and Siray felt the cold soil and rock dig into her back as his body leaned against hers. The hard-packed dirt at her back and the warmth of his body helped her recover a little from the shock that had spread through her.

  Siray could feel the hard muscles of Baindan’s torso as he pressed against the length of her, and Baindan dropped Siray’s hands, raising his to cup her face instead. ‘This is not your fault,’ he whispered back. ‘You alone had the courage to do what the rest of us were too afraid to.’

  She opened her eyes. Baindan’s face hovered before hers, his eyes filling most of her view. ‘I condemned us to this,’ she stated before giving a short, derisive laugh. ‘For an instant after I woke, I thought that we were fortunate that they hadn’t killed us outright.’ She shook her head, her eyes going hard. ‘But this is far worse than death.’

  Baindan was looking at her now, his eyes considering her face, as if he was reading something new in the anguish there. She watched as his eyes opened a little wider, his expression growing more disbelieving each moment … and she realised he knew what she had been about to say earlier.

  Then his lips were swooping in to capture hers, his hands and arms dropping to encircle her waist.

  Siray responded instantly, her mouth moving against his as she tasted him, her entire body purring at his touch.

  But she couldn’t finish that sentence she had started to say. Couldn’t say the words that would instantly formalise the bond between them.

  Not in this place, when their future was so uncertain now.

  But she could enjoy this moment, just for now, regardless of what was to come.

  Baindan’s body was responding to her eagerness, his broad chest pushing against hers as he wrapped one hand around the back of her neck, the other tangling in her hair, which had finally come loose from its tie.

  ‘Siray. My Siray,’ he murmured against her lips before placing kisses over her dirt-streaked cheek, across her jaw, and down the line of her neck.

  Siray closed her eyes, the intense pleasure generated from his kisses and the sharp pain at what they both now stood to lose coursing through her, and she expressed this by focusing her attention on Baindan’s own neck, working upwards, to his ear and then back along his jaw …

  When their lips met again, it was a long moment before their mouths drifted apart once more.

  Siray opened her eyes quickly as a thought occurred to her. ‘Baindan,’ she whispered even more quietly. ‘You can get away. You can Change and fly away from here.’ Her heart grew lighter, even if, at the same time, a part of her felt sick at the thought of being parted from him. Nevertheless, Baindan could escape. He could live. And then she would only have to take one life to save herself.

  But Baindan shook his head. ‘I’ve already considered it. Even if I could pass safely over the walls here without being pierced by arrows, I’d still have to outrun any of the guards who could also Change into a winged form.’ He shook his head. ‘It’s too risky. And even if that was an option, I’d never leave you.’

  Although Siray’s heart sank at his rational analysis of her suggestion, the devotion she heard in Baindan’s words made her launch herself at him, and this time she was the fire, burning for more of him as she wrapped her arms tight around his neck and pressed the lines of her body to his.

  Baindan kissed her back, his hold on her unyielding, as if no one could take her from him.

  After a long moment, they finally broke apart, both of them gasping for air, the expression on Baindan’s face making Siray think he was exercising a lot of willpower in that moment to stop himself from grabbing her up again.

  He seemed to settle for brushing a tangled lock of her long red hair off her shoulder, giving a quiet but sad chuckle. ‘Why is it that we never seem to catch a break?’

  Siray gave him a bitter smile. ‘Maybe the Mother despises us?’

  Baindan shook his head, reaching up to stroke her cheek. ‘Never. She wouldn’t have shown me the way to you so many times if that were true.’ He moved close enough so that he could rest his forehead against hers, and whispered, ‘And she will help us find a way out of this.’

  Siray wasn’t sure if she believed that last part or not, but she nodded anyway, at least willing to hope it could be true. And though she still yearned to speak the formal words of commitment to him, the walls of the pit looming around them were a stark reminder of the potential end awaiting them both.

  So Siray just rested her head on Baindan’s shoulder and let the words burn silently within her.

  ***

  They both stayed on edge as evening drew on, keeping an eye on the other captive as he regained consciousness and began slinking back and forth along the far wall, snatching glances at them occasionally.

  Siray knew it was his fear of Baindan that made him keep checking on where they were, though she also didn’t doubt that he might try to attack them during the night, given that all three of them were aware that only one of them could emerge from that hole.

  Faced with a threat in the pit and the potential of new threats being, literally, dropped on them from above, Siray and Baindan once more adopted the habits they had developed while they had been on the run from the Faction, one of them watching the male across from them and one watching the edges of the hole for movement, both listening for any sounds.

  They had just swapped roles when Siray heard noises from outside of the pit. She stood, moving towards the centre of the sunken space as she tried to discern what it was she could hear.

  Baindan joined her, his eyes never leaving the other male as he positioned himself between them. ‘What is it?’ he murmured.

  Siray listened intently for a moment. The sounds were growing louder. ‘I think the others are returning.’

  Her guess was quickly confirmed by the nearing clomp of many booted feet hitting the ground. Going by the dwindling light in the sky, the group of captives above, including her friends—her remaining friends—were returning later than normal to the yard.

  Soon all sounds of movement from ground level died away, and Siray tried to picture what was happening. The captives would all be lining up and Captain Raq
ue would be starting his usual evening spiel, taunting, tormenting, or threatening them as would take his fancy.

  As if on cue, a hard voice above starting speaking, and she, Baindan, and the other captive tensed as they gave their full attention over to the voice that could either save them or destroy them. Most likely the latter.

  ‘So, what a day it seems you’ve all had,’ said the voice languidly, amusement underlying the words. ‘One of you disobeying a direct order …’

  Siray’s whole body became rigid. Raque was talking about Loce.

  ‘And someone else taking on Herrin.’

  A chuckle reached Siray’s ears. Raque was actually laughing at her.

  ‘Which unfortunately resulted in two further additions to the pit.’

  Siray heard a purposeful yet imperious step nearing the edge above, and she began backing up, instinctively retreating with Baindan to the wall farthest away from the approach of those boots.

  The other captive merely tried to shrink farther into the corner of the pit that he had staked out.

  Raque’s face appeared above the edge of the hole, and he peered down at each of them for a moment. Then he spun back around to address the captives that Siray knew would be watching cautiously from across the yard.

  ‘Alas, it looks like no one has yet emerged as a victor.’ Raque turned back to glance down at them, and this time, she saw him look more closely at her and Baindan, which gave her an unsettled feeling.

  She liked even less the knowing expression that arose on his face just before he wheeled about once more, his boots thumping against the stone work above as he moved … somewhere. Siray could have sworn she heard him murmur something to a nearby guard, and when the sound of another lighter pair of boots hurrying away met her ears, she guessed that Raque had given some order. The hairs on her arms rose.